While going through my collection of papers from Women’s Ministry, I stumbled upon notes from a message we heard called “Keeping It Real: Seven Truths.” While I am unable to give credit to the exact speaker, these truths are too good not to share.
1. My children will make mistakes.
…And at the most inopportune times. No matter how “great” a momma I am, kids will be kids. I must separate their choices from my self-image and God’s view of me and remember that they are a work in process.
2. My husband will make mistakes.
At various times I have expected my husband to be perfect. I’ve expected him to act in a certain way or say the perfect words (according to my opinion). I’ve expected him to learn from his mistakes and never “hurt” me again, especially after having had a good conversation about the issue. These unspoken expectations are not fair to him. I must give him grace and not take his mistakes personally.
3. I will make mistakes.
This sentences is hard for me to even type. Not because I don’t believe I make mistakes in my parenting journey, but because I try with all my might to avoid future mistakes. Call it “Type A.” Call it “perfectionism.” Either way, accepting this is a struggle. But we are human. We get tired. Outside situations cause our emotions to fail us. But just as we must give others grace, we need to give ourselves grace and accept our need of a Savior.
4. Nothing surprised God.
My favorite verse from Jeremiah 29:11 “For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.”
Another set of verses from Psalm 139:1-3. “You have searched me, Lord, and you know me. You know when I sit and when I rise; you perceive my thoughts from afar. You discern my going out and my lying down; you are familiar with all my ways.”
There is peace in the fact that God is into the details of our sometime mundane lives.
5. My identity is not found in my parenting.
I am a child of the King. Being a mom is a role, a job that I play. Nothing is going to change who I am and my relationship with my Father. The challenges of parenting will only change what I do, not who I am.
6. I am not responsible for the end product.
I am responsible to “impress” God on my children (Deut 6:5-9). I am responsible for their training. I am to be intentional. I am to live a Spirit-filled life before them. I am to love God and love others.
I am not responsible for the choices my children make in life. This is very hard for me to come to terms with.
7. Only three things are eternal – God, God’s Word, and the souls of men.
I often think of the verse from Matthew 16:26. “What good will it be for someone to gain the whole world, yet forfeit their soul?”
In mommy-terms God is asking me, “What good is it for you to have the most beautiful home, to be the PTO president, and to volunteer the most hours at church, only to miss the opportunity to pour into your own children?” Right now, my Great Commission…my “disciples” are my children.
Good reminders! I hope that each point has encouraged you as much as they have helped redirect my focus.
Being intentional with children can be rough. But we don’t have to walk the road alone. Be sure to join other like-minded parents, grandparents, and teachers in our private Facebook groups.