We are very prideful people. Seriously! We want everyone to believe that we are great moms who love and discipline our kids perfectly. If someone thinks differently, we are hurt on a personal level.
A part of me wants to tell the whole world that Bubs has SPD. Then if he has a rough day, I won’t look so bad. People then would “understand” what is going on instead of looking at me like I need to do my job. But I realize that this is a pride issue. I am more concerned about what people think of me than Bubs succeeding.
I urge you to pray about your motive. It is so easy to take our child’s behavior as a personal attack on us as moms.
With that said, there are helpful points that people need to know so that your child can succeed. When we have a babysitter, I tell Bubs – in front of the babysitter – that when he feels like he is getting out of control to go jump on the trampoline. I then reinforce it with the babysitter. She doesn’t need to know any more information than that. I also tell her other calming activities to do with Bubs.
If we continually have issues at church, I will explain to a teacher that we are working on Bubs not following bad choices that other people make. Please move him if he sits by someone making bad choices.
Before going somewhere, Bubs and I pray about him making good choices. We talk about Jesus living in his heart (Bubs was saved last summer). Jesus is always with him helping him make good choices.
Above all, not matter what the diagnosis (SPD, ADD, Autism), we have to help children learn to function in the real world. Bring in a professional – for us it has been through Occupational Therapy – to come along side you. Constantly ask questions. For the first year of OT, I was in every minute – watching, learning, taking notes of what to do with Bubs at home. If we have something that is causing issues at home, I take it to OT for them to work on it with him. (Our kitchen timer sent Bubs through the roof, so Ms. W used our timer at therapy to help him get over the sensory issue with it.) I can’t say enough about Occupational Therapy and the difference it has made.
Train up your child to love the Lord and love others. It is not easy. But God will walk ever step of the way with us.
Thank you, Heather, for this great question (and for your comments). Please let me know your questions as well as thought about what you find on this blog!